dragonsong

dragonsong

have you ever

played with the dragons?–

one changed me, for a while

and we spun arabesques1

in the wind, lighting

the sky in our fiery course.

ah–have you ever

played with the dragons? i

did; it ruined

my life. i’ve spent it dreaming,

trying vaguely to recreate

those half-remembered flights.

dedicated to Ursula K. Leguin the The Earthsea trilogy; she did read it.

August 25, 2020 at 6:24 pm Leave a comment

Trump And The Election

https://www.yahoo.com/news/voter-intimidation-trump-floats-illegal-155035849.html

To me it has been very apparent that Donald is a worshiper of the notion of the Godking. The separation of church and state (the bias inherent in the very naming of this ‘principle’ should be obvious) is hypothetical, as was Marx’ withering away of the government. Neither is in fact possible. The separation of Realpolitik from any moral system has been proven to occur, and thus far it has proven fatal in the short term to those who attempt to establish it. The people–“the governed” in this formulation I’m mentioning, which attempts to deal only with that favored phrase–are the origin of power. Admittedly, the current amount of control coupled with the percentage of the dissatisfied residents of this country is an explosive mixture, and it cannot be resolved until said citizens–we–have reasserted control.

Unfortunately, that’s impossible.

Vlad and Xi both used tactics to establish their power which Trump admired.

He’s also been attracted to the use of nuclear weapons since before he was president. That is, he talked about it a great deal and was in favor of their usage, from what I could gather of his Rush Limbaugh-like rambling monologues.

There are other things, but I’m tired and wary.

GCC/GCS

August 21, 2020 at 5:07 pm Leave a comment

blind repetition or ritual?

blind repetition or ritual?

at times your remembrance

blinds me into setting

your place again at the table

although you are gone from here

and no matter how

we might grieve or pray

you shall not (ever) return.

quietly, i replace the dishes

and then stand for a moment

staring down into

the winter-shadowed valley from this hill

(and remembering that hill

of yours).

actually, we parted

when i was a child

and i am old now.

at times, i find myself

setting your place…

August 20, 2020 at 11:30 pm 1 comment

Why It’s Hard to Overcome my Practiced Silence

https://news.yahoo.com/former-cia-officer-charged-providing-194434890.html

My reticence about the Navy was enforced while I was still in it. I couldn’t even talk to others in my division (including the five enlisted who also had Crypto clearance–other than chiefs and above, and who also had only need-to-know access to classified information).

I’ve already been accused of supplying information to foreign governments. I got out of the Navy in 1975. That surfaced in this century and was in reference, mainly, to this blog. They did have a serious problem with formally charging me; they can’t even fabricate evidence that I’m receiving monies from such entities, or even that I’m communicating with them.

However, after all that time, they’ve finally acknowledged I was (knowingly) working for the NSA. I can’t be silent, but I’m unable to hurry. And there is so much distortion of twentieth century history at this point, someone correcting the PAO [Public Affairs Office, which prepares statements for the press and the like] hugely may have repercussions.

I’m dying. If they imprison me I’ll die more quickly. I’m also in greater pain each and every day, although I’ve refused to even discuss taking more oxycodone or some other, more powerful drug.

August 17, 2020 at 6:09 pm Leave a comment

Environmental Dissolution Due to An Invasive Species

https://www.yahoo.com/news/greenlands-melting-ice-sheet-passed-002749194.html

The author of this article doesn’t seem to appreciate how quickly things will accelerate as far as melting ice (and snow) and their contribution to the sea level. Even the ocean’s major currents are shifting; air flow is far different from what it was in 1960. Without detailing it, I personally watched the changed and kept in touch with the records of what changed in terms of public availability. During my tour in the Navy I accidentally accessed a means of research. I was devastated by the fact that the assumptions (pardon me, “a prioris”, since “You know what assume means? IT MAKES AN ASS OUT OF YOU AND ME!”–a military aphorism, and an implicit admission that there is no knowledge of what an a priori is. That means that it admittedly occurs outside the realm of logic. And yes, that means there is a decided vulnerability that is both implicit and irremediable–and yes, as far as that goes, that could be the implication of a threat–but what could a dying cripple do to endanger the powers that be?) that I’d privately made were entirely correct.

The second thing to point out is that when the rain forests dessicate to the point that nearly simultaneous fires start, to the point that a noticeable portion of the given continent is aflame, the amount of ash released into the atmosphere is the second most serious consequence. The most serious consequence should be extremely obvious. However, I’ll delay that for a bit. That ash amount will be somewhere around the volume released by Krakatoa. That means a precipitous decline in temperature will immediately ensue.

Should this occur, it is extremely unlikely that it will occur on one continent (or portion thereof) alone.

I’ll add one hint, exhausted or not. There are a couple of fun notes about Hanford.

Oh, and if you’re getting nervous–I’m not talking to single people, but a rather large and unnamed group–there’s an easy way to shut me up. Contact me about paying me for forcing me to do an illegal job. If you don’t understand that, it doesn’t concern you. Most people have nothing to do with it, and couldn’t.

The Sargasso Sea used to be a horizon-to-horizon expanse of seaweed. Now, it’s plastic.

The matter on top of that Sea–which is caused by currents establishing a portion of sea somewhat akin to the “eye” of a circular wind form–slowly “precipitates” to the bottom of the ocean. It is then absorbed by plants, which are eaten, and a progression up the “food chain” begins. Any part of that particular food chain will then have some portion of their bodies made of…plastic. That was the object of observation in the latter portion of the 20th century.

What does this mean in terms of genetic changes in both plants and animals, short and long term?

Then of course we should cast a momentary glance at the nanoparticles that were so popular for, oh, forty years or so? They were used for flavoring in toothpaste, among other things. Those old enough will even remember the advertisement of “nanoparticles” as a particularly good thing, although why it was supposed to be good was never quite addressed, other than that it was due to “recent scientific advancements”. Now the bottoms of our streams and rivers are covered with these tiny particles and no one has the slightest idea of how to remove them. Hint: look up nano if this confused you at all. Look it up on the net.

There’s another particularly oblivious way that the U.S. government employed on nuclear waste disposal, but to be honest I’m tired. I actually apparently have evidence–probably not recoverable–that I was being poisoned for a couple of years, which was why some portions of myself deteriorated. It would help explain why some of these conditions have disappeared and the others are waning still. [A hospital made many notes that there was suspected poisoning and I consistently thought they meant I was poisoning myself with illegal drugs; however, long after that I realized that they never once asked me about drug usage. I’m sure it’s an incidental note that I’m going through a divorce initiated by my spouse.

Anyway, the most obvious thing is this. A huge fire involves massive usage of oxygen. The Sargasso Sea being covered with plastic means that the biggest former single producer of oxygen is steadily losing ability to do that (the ocean). The rain forests were major producers of oxygen.

By the way, the biggest single contributor to atmospheric pollution of which I know is the usage of jets. They burn approximately 45% of their fuel. The other 55-60%–I’m being optimistic, now, on the figures–is used as coolant so that the ceramic linings of the jet engines themselves don’t disappear. Even when not burnt, mind you, it serves as propellant. The point is that contrails have nothing to do with atmospheric condensation, they’re raw fuel.

August 16, 2020 at 7:42 pm Leave a comment

About Printers

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/printers-will-always-be-terrible

Please read the article first. Now then; I have an HP Laserjet MFP M28-M31. It’s a monochrome (black and white) laser printer. Color printers are much more complicated and thus much more prone to error. Unfortunately, inkjet printers still do tend to dry up their cartridges if under-used; at one time I used to have a backup color inkjet and there was a fundamental problem with the concept. This printer is fast (at printing), quiet, and holds a fairly good amount of paper, something like 50 sheets. That’s actually good, because the more paper can be stored for input, the more prone the paper is to ‘misbehave’, from any number of reasons. It’s a bit slow at scanning but has excellent output (which is, yes, color; it just can’t print color).

Never buy top-end and never buy bottom-end (speaking of pricing) computers or accessories. The top-end ones cost more than they’re worth. The bottom-end ones are worthless. Canon and HP in my experience are very reliable. Dell is a step below. Epson is of inconsistent quality.

PC Magazine is the best source I know of for hardware critiques (and software, for that matter).

And to the writer of that article I have one thing to say. “Idiot.”

August 16, 2020 at 5:08 pm Leave a comment

Evolution

No. You’ve got it wrong. Even ‘mere’ mating requires language, which mandates shared ideation. It is this and other very similar things which in fact drive ‘evolution.’

August 14, 2020 at 6:16 pm Leave a comment

To Sue (Gillespie)

To Sue (nee) Gillespie

I never guessed, and I’m sure you don’t know that. When you came angrily chasing me long after (it was long after for me, because for years each day without you dessicated my soul a little more, and I was freshly home from the war where veterans were mainly scorned, and because you were so perfect, starting with your intelligence and wit) you’d told me to leave, I couldn’t imagine what you could want. You’d said you hated me at the point of our last words, as I recall it.

I’d buried away the memory of that one afternoon where I made love to you (yes, it was that) and almost instantly your parents drove home, as the others alerted us. I’d convinced myself I was sterile.

Is it surprising that it took me forty five years to suddenly realize what your anger was about? I had no idea you were pregnant. I’d have married you in an instant, not that I was much of a prize. I suspect I would have been, because I would have been able to escape the nightmare circlings of the past and things I’d done.

And the absolute worst part of all of this? you never guessed I didn’t realize and I’m sure you’ll never know. That was Whidbey Island, when I wore my adopted last name of Smith and I was freshly out of the Vietnam war; our first meeting was at the community college where you volunteered to work on the paper with me and…you were so perfect and young that I could only flee. Well, no, that’s not the worst, come to think of it. You could never accept that I actually did love you. Not your face that launched a thousand ships, or any of your other countless beautiful aspects; I loved you.

And because I didn’t realize, you had the child aborted. But then you never knew this, either; my mother tried frantically to have me aborted. And each fetus thereafter was caught in a timely fashion, so that there was no problem. Somewhere between six and twelve from what I could figure. “You remember all those trips to Las Vegas I told you about, so Jay could gamble? Actually, I was just getting another abortion.”

Yes, I’d have married you.

August 14, 2020 at 12:40 am Leave a comment

An Interim Post

I’ve been trying to recover a draft. It isn’t happening, which means I have to return to the habit that never failed; write posts on a word processor and then cut-and-paste to WordPress (or LiveJournal, but I haven’t posted there in a long time; I couldn’t and I had long ago chosen WordPress as my platform, and when apparently I finally could again I’d lost all interest).

That’s the reason for the somewhat long silence. Well, that and my gift with electrical things (the one that was witnessed by the most people was when I knocked down the computer on board ComSeventhflt’s flagship the day the Evacuation–Vietnam–started; it came up the day it ended). Some people may think I brag about it. I’m complaining. I had my old standby XPS 2720 ONE (Dell) apparently get the boot track on yet another HD, which is entirely non-mysterious. Then I switched to this HP Compaq 6200 Pro…and twice it’s somehow forgotten what the boot drive is. Yes, it shows C: on the usual pre-boot menu. This, however, has the full BIOS options as of old. It was booting to Win 10, but the authorized sign-ins were wrong (too many and the wrong ones, as in)–as if it were the 2720, but this should not have been able to boot from that, since it isn’t an AIO for starts. By ‘playing’ around I got it to boot correctly, however, some odd things like Brave [new browser, descendant of Chrome and I do heartily recommend it; for one thing, it’s extremely fast, although I prefer Firefox for security reasons–unless Brave is put into Private Mode which is of all things Tor!] forgetting all its passwords.

Since I’m in random mode, rely on PC Mag for ratings and then go to eBay but watch seller reputation on Antivirus suites, although for other software I would simply head to Ashampoo first.

I’m disappointed to have lost quite a bit of writing. I’d ironically decided to rely on technology, since always before it presented me with the option to recover the draft (even of completed posts).

Yes, that means I “never” rely on technology. Everyone has their stupid moments, though.

August 8, 2020 at 11:45 pm Leave a comment

on presuming to be a poet

on presuming to be a poet

you ask me why i write
then look askance
when i tell you it is
— merely a lense
for my poor vision—
and aid for my stuttering tongue

July 28, 2020 at 2:59 pm Leave a comment

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